I am lucky enough to work near the monolith that is the Westfield shopping centre in Shepherd’s Bush. A big shiny monument to shit that you don’t need to buy it may well be, but it’s also pretty handy when you’ve spilt a cup of tea on yourself and need to make an emergency shirt purchase on your lunch break.
The jewel in the crown is its branch of Marks and Spencer. Normally you’d expect nothing of note bar gratuitously offensive Blue Harbour fleeces or functional yet unexciting underwear, but whoever they get to dress and pose their mannequins is either a genius or works there under the Care in the Community scheme. Take a look for yourself.
The “Have a sniff of these” range

The “Slipped on a canapé in the MCC members’ bar” range

The “Just closed a deal” range

The “Don’t leave me hangin’, bitch” range

The “Dancing around the herbal highs van at Glastonbury” range

The “2-for-1 on Jagerbombs in the student union” range

The “You, outside” range

The “Cuckolded husband waits for revenge in car park of Battersea All Bar One” range

The “I’m afraid there’s a problem with your expenses this month” range

The “Homoerotica in anti-gravity” range

By DAN GILSON
